Ideal Matches, Striving, and Basically Babysitting...

Well… I must continue on my quest of cleaning up all resumes across the world. Although it may seem a daunting task, I am willing to take it on. By writing this blog, I feel like a character on “Heroes” – you know… you’ve heard the line… “Save the [resumes]. Save the world”? Right? What the heck am I talking about anyway??

Here are a few that were found on one resume:

• “It was of great interest that I saw your advertisement.” – Seriously, it was for an office clerk.
• “My skills and your companies [we only advertised for one company] goals are an ideal match.” – Well, although that may be possible, it is unlikely that an 18 word classified would give you that much information. Recommendation: DON’T STRETCH!!
• “I provide excellent service and strive to maintain a pleasant working environment.” – I am going to have to say, if ya gotta “strive” you might want to strive to be a better person, achieve great things, or towards big visions… If you have to ‘exert much effort or energy or fight forcefully’ (according to American Heritage) to get along with people, odds are you probably aren’t gunna get the job.

Yes, this came from one resume. Only to be outdone by another (yes, singular) submission:

• I really don’t need a 7 page resume for an office clerk position.
• Listing your Grade School, Middle School and High School under Education. – I would be able to guess that you graduated from Grade School if you list your Middle School. And just a shot in the dark… both if you graduate from High School.
• “I did very well academic wise in high school” – huh?
• “I basically babysat children from the age of 6 weeks to 5 years old.” Basically?? So many comments, so little time.
• Yeah, so after making these (and others I might add) mistakes, including 4 letters of recommendation is a little overkill and will leave potential employers wondering… instead of asking for a letter of recommendation… have one of them review the resume!

More worthless words later…